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Gratitude gets prescribed more than almost anything else and usually in list form, which is the version that stops working fastest. Naming three things becomes an inventory, and an inventory is a task.
What this practice is
The practice here is narrower and slower. One thing, stayed with long enough to actually register, rather than several noted and moved past. What makes gratitude do anything is the dwelling, and a list is designed to prevent dwelling.
It also works with something ordinary rather than something large. The large things are abstract and hard to feel, and a specific small one that happened this week is available in a way that being grateful for your health is not.
What is being trained is a direction of attention. Attention drifts by default toward what is missing or unresolved, which is useful and is not the only setting available. The practice is the deliberate other direction, repeated.
The tradition treats contentment as cultivable and puts it near the centre rather than as a nicety. What people commonly report is noticing things during the day that would have gone past. Studies on gratitude exist and are not cited here, because the honest version of that literature is more complicated than a blog post can carry.
When to use it
Practise it in the evening if you want it to catch the day, which is when there is something specific and recent to work with.
It suits an ordinary week rather than a bad one. On a genuinely hard day gratitude practice tends to turn into an argument about whether you are allowed to be upset, and that is not useful to anyone.
Do not reach for it as a response to someone else being in difficulty, including yourself. Gratitude used to close a feeling down is the misuse of this practice and it is a common one.
The sessions
Cultivating Gratitude, one practice at three lengths, 9 to 24 minutes. One session here is in the free tier and the rest need Premium. The table says which.
| Length | Tier |
|---|---|
| 9 min | Free |
| 17 min | Premium |
| 24 min | Premium |
How long to practise for
The short session is enough for one thing dwelt on properly, which is the whole instruction. Longer does not mean more things.
The longer sessions give room to stay past the point where the mind wants to move on, which is usually about ninety seconds in and is where the practice actually starts.
The general version of this, and what a longer session actually adds, is in How Long to Meditate For: Choosing a Session Length.
How to use it
Pick one thing, and something small. Not your family in general, but something that happened on Tuesday.
Stay with it past the point of having acknowledged it. The acknowledgement takes a few seconds and the practice is what comes after.
Let it be physical if it wants to be. Gratitude registers in the body for a lot of people and going looking for the feeling in the chest is often more productive than thinking about the reason.
Change the thing regularly. The same item every night becomes a phrase rather than an experience.
What usually goes wrong
Making a list. Enumerating prevents dwelling and dwelling is the mechanism. One thing is the instruction and it is not a starting number.
Choosing something abstract. Being grateful for your health is a sentiment. Being grateful for a specific ten minutes on Tuesday is an experience.
Using it to talk yourself out of a feeling. Gratitude deployed against a legitimate complaint is dismissal in a nicer register. Both things can be true.
Practising it on the worst days. That is where it most often curdles into obligation. Something undemanding is the better choice then.
One thing, dwelt on
PanchPrana keeps this to one thing rather than three, because the counting is what stops it working. The shortest session is a complete practice at that.
Who should take care
This is among the gentlest practices here and the cautions are mostly about how gratitude gets used rather than about the sitting.
If you live with depression, take care. Being unable to feel gratitude is a symptom rather than a failure of effort, and a practice that becomes evidence you are doing badly is working against you. Ease off or skip it during a low period.
If you are grieving or in a genuinely difficult situation, gratitude practice can become pressure to be positive about something that is not. Skip it rather than forcing it, and use something that asks nothing instead.
Stop if a session leaves you feeling worse or more guilty, which is a recognised response and not a sign you need to try harder. Persistent inability to feel pleasure or appreciation is worth raising with a doctor.
See our full Health & Safety Disclaimer.
Common questions
Why not just keep a gratitude journal?
A journal tends toward listing, and listing prevents the dwelling that makes gratitude register at all. If a journal works for you, keep it and slow it down.
What if I cannot think of anything?
Go smaller and more recent. A cup of tea, a message, five quiet minutes. If nothing at all is available, that is worth noticing rather than pushing past.
Is it wrong to be grateful and unhappy at once?
Not at all, and they coexist constantly. Gratitude used to cancel unhappiness is the misuse worth avoiding.
Does gratitude practice actually work?
People commonly report noticing more during the day. There is research on this and it is more mixed than the popular version suggests, so nothing here is claimed from it.
Should I practise this every day?
Most days is fine. On a genuinely hard day something undemanding is the better choice.
